Nomad soul frozen,
Direction seems lacking,
Perfected facade,
Deep surfaces cracking.

Running on pause,
Quickly losing races,
Vivid the bodies,
Blurring of faces,
Locked in people,
Losing soul in places,
Who exists in the body,
My finger traces?

Future in shackles,
Love my addiction,
Lacking completely,
In truth and conviction.

Wide open windows,
Fixed gaze on closed doors,
Failure of distinction,
The pain,
Mine or yours?
Slipping away,
Crawling towards,
Sitting with angels,
Disguised as whores,
Torn by the memories,
The heart it stores.

Do I only exist,
Your simple placation?
Does this mirror reflect,
Love, or desperation?
Sex and my soul,
Painful separation.
Passing the point,
No return or reparation,
Patient is the noose,
While awaiting salvation.

Megan Forrest
December 20, 2019

It rattles like a freight train, 

A frantic fever burning in my head, 

With Lucifer I play a wait game, 

Before the rush I'm seeing red.

There seems to be no end in sight, 

Our body count begins to rise, 

This demon claws at me with all its might, 

Indecipherable, me from my disguise.

My escape, a quick and simple plan, 

Evade the darkness in my life,

With greed my soul it now demands,  

I must choose a needle or a knife. 

Disgusts me how I feel inside, 

The shame, the guilt, the fear,

Wasn’t it today we took that ride?

How did yesterday become a year?

I've told you how I'm oh so sorry, 

Over and again I pay this debt, 

They think my life's an endless party, 

Honest truth? It is just regret.

You don't believe I miss your smile, 

Matter of fact, I miss mine too, 

You see, its been missing for quite awhile, 

Sometimes I think it left with you.

I'm uncertain I've left any hope, 

My past overshadows the best in me,

Weary hands bleed, clinging to this rope,

Tomorrow remains impossible to see.

For you and I, I hate me just enough, 

Every day I struggle to forget why, 

I’m afraid and honesty is so tough,

I’m only safe within this lie.

To lie here in sweet silence, 

For a moment I escape the screaming in my soul, 

Did you know the Devil ain’t so good with guidance? 

Try to fill the void with another hole. 

Please don’t fret, do not waste worry, 

Tonight I am inside, and I’m not cold, 

For just today I don't have to hurry, 

Addiction has not yet killed my body,

It has only claimed my soul.

Megan J Forrest, 

March 13th, 2019

Push and pull my souls on fire,
My head spinning like a top,
My heart a book of matches,
Lit them one by one, you couldn't stop,
Appears to me with no regrets,
You and I went up in flames,
When you were cold I knelt by you,
Now you won't even say my name,
I wish I knew how to put us out,
Without burning with you to the ground,
I feel there's so much left to say,
Somehow I always seem to let you down,
My souls is shaken but I can't run,
I love to burn until I blister to the bone,
So much easier to save yourself,
Even by your side I see I was alone,
I don't think you'll come to rescue me,
Too hard to run while looking back,
I hear you like to play with hearts
I hope you burn mine until its black,
I hate the way I melt into your touch,
I admit I can't help but play with fire,
Been known to douse myself in kerosene,
So powerful the heat of this desire,
So hot we burn when our bodies collide,
Our passion set the world ablaze,
Now I choke on tears and smoke,
Left to smoulder in this haze,
I'm sorry I can be so reckless,
I never mean to incinerate my world,
I always believe fire is so simple,
Just a spark between a boy and girl.

Take whatever is left of me,
Please hold it in your heart,
I'm not quite sure what's left you see,
Been losing pieces from the start.
One by one, piece by piece,
For every wrong thing that I found,
Unknowingly my hands filled up,
Until shame matched me pound for pound.
I tried to hide it in my pockets,
I willed it not to make a peep,
We hid together quiet in the shadows,
Save for the screaming in my sleep.
Please don't stop to pity me,
Though lonely I've never been alone,
Always together, pain and me,
So long it kind of feels like home.
It lives right behind my biggest smile,
It's voice the echo of my laugh,
It holds me when I get too close,
To living in the present not my past.
I thought it left me a time or two,
So empty are my heart and hands,
Insidious it moved into my soul,
Doubt stole my best laid plans.
I heard somewhere I must unbecome,
Everything I think I am,
I must believe I can come undone,
However I'm not sure if I can.
There is no place like home,
Yet now I'm told I may have been misled,
Over the river and through the woods,
My path disappeared like crumbs of bread.
The fairy tales just aren't true,
My mother failed to mention that,
For even someone loves the witch,
Yet only wrote about her hat.
So maybe it's not about becoming something,
And when they tell the story of me,
Once upon a time she lost her fear,
Everything she never hoped to be.